Musings, travel, Uncategorized

Rewrite Your Stars … or How Dreaming Makes You Successful

Within the last few months, I’ve seen at least two movies that include a storyline about a character rewriting the stars; that seemingly predestined journey through life that fate deems inevitable. In these movies, as in real life, those who are able to find a more satisfying, even fascinating path are called dreamers.  

I have always been a dreamer! When I was young, that label was used to chastise: “Get your head out of the clouds.” “Pay attention and stop daydreaming.” “You’ll never get anywhere if you don’t stop wasting your time dreaming.”

Those phrases held me back. I’d dream of rewriting my stars and  hear one of those voices in my head reminding me how futile dreaming is.

Somewhere in my 40s the voices stopped. I started dreaming again. At first it was cautious, but eventually I dreamt with an almost childlike enthusiasm. I acted on those dreams.

There are those who work all day. Those who dream all day. And those who spend an hour dreaming before setting to work to fulfill those dreams. Go into the third category because there’s virtually no competition.

Steve Ross, Former CEO, Time-Warner

I noticed a sparkle return to my eyes. Smiles came easier. I found myself spending less time worrying and regretting and more time dreaming and looking ahead. I walked away from people in my life whose voices echoed those taunting, anti-dreamer thoughts.

Somehow, looking back, I knew I’d always be a dreamer. I’d always found a way to make a dream come true. I always found enough money for another trip (a consistently repeating dream involves travel). I never gave up looking for professional satisfaction — at least not until I realized my life outside of the office was shining brighter that life in the office. 

When I started to dream more, I found myself surrounded by other dreamers. Oh sure, there were still naysayers in my life and their “poo-pooing” was ever present. I started seeing them as sad and unfulfilled.

My new life is filled with joy. Smiles are a constant. I travel more and am achieving my dream of doing it in style. Sending happiness out into the world has brought it back to me time and time again.

I say “thank you” all the time. To my fellow-dreamer, fellow-nomadic, enthusiastic, happy husband … to God … to the universe … to any and everyone who gives me another reason to smile. 

I relax more and enjoy more. Little annoyances are dismissed with ease, pushed out to make more room for joy. 

Ten years ago it seemed the stars were pointing me to a future of settling for things, of growing old without much excitement. Then I started dreaming again — and I rewrote my own stars!

There’s a whole world out there waiting to be explored … start with a dream.

Musings, travel, Uncategorized

Black and White — or Shades of Brown?

When my son was about two-and-a-half, we found ourselves at JFK Airport waiting for a flight. He has always been a good traveler and we managed to keep ourselves busy for a little while people-watching. After about ten minutes of a never-ending stream of passers by, he turned to me and gave me one of those looks that only a two-year-old can muster — so very serious, but overwhelmingly curious. 

“Mom,” he asked, “why do we say people are black and white?” 

WOW! How do you answer a question like that? I didn’t want to influence his thought, so I answered his question with a question: “What do you mean?”

“Well,” he pondered, “there are lots of people here and I’ve been looking at them, but I haven’t seen anyone who is black or anyone who is white.”

I responded with another question, “What color are all these people?”

His response was quick and perfunctory, “Brown.” Nothing more, nothing less. His innocent observation of probably a few hundred people was that everyone was brown.

I was proud. JFK Airport is an endless variety of people. International travelers from every corner of the world passed by our seats. We’d seen people with every shade of brown you could imagine. I asked him to explain what he meant by brown.

He said, “well, some people are really light brown – like you, and some people are darker brown – like dad (his father is part-Hispanic), and some people are really dark brown – like the chocolate you like. 

OK, that gave me a little chuckle, people described as the colors of food was a great two-year-old observation.

We spent a couple of minutes wondering why anyone would say black or white to describe a person and never really came up with an answer. I explained that people from different places have different color skin and they also have different cultures and music and food and wear different clothes. He asked if the kids play with different toys. “Yes, they do,” I answered. He asked if he could play with other kinds of toys and I noticed the topic had returned to more typical kid conversation.

That conversation has stuck with me his whole life. He is almost 30 and still has the same wild curiosity about life and people. I am still proud.

I wish everyone could see the world through his two-year-old eyes. I wish everyone could see differences as fascinating instead of scary. I wish people could see the world in a never-ending number of shades of brown and not black and white. 

After all, there’s a whole world out there waiting to be explored … it’s thrilling and different and brilliantly colorful … go see it!

Distractions, Diversion, Musings, The World A to Z, travel

Meandering … and Impatience

EDITOR’s NOTE: I wrote this several months ago, but recently realized it was never posted. The thoughts are still relevant, however. As they say …  better late than never.

I have come to appreciate meandering. For most of my life, nearly everything I did was rush, rush, rush. About the same time Greg and I got together, I learned how to slow down. Along the way, we created road trip “diversions.” As a reader of this blog, you’ve seen us write about these stops that are not on our plan, but rather something that caught our eye and intrigued us enough to check it out.  

The rush of my youth was great for me. I’ve never really had any patience and hurrying here and there is perfect for someone who just can’t seem to find a way to wait for anything. Yet, somehow, here I am appreciating wandering, lollygagging, dilly-dallying. 

Often, when we land after a long flight, we make our way to a favorite restaurant for a bite to eat on the way home. The fridge is not stocked; we are craving a little nosh; and friends beckon. 

Today, though, I find myself wanting to get home. My impatient inner-child longs to rush through the next few weeks as we make final preparations for our permanent move out west. I want to go home, get packed and move sooner. I’m anxious to start the next chapter of life in a new home, in a new world (the desert southwest), with new friends. I know the benefits of taking our time to get through this next phase. We will be more careful, forget less, be more attentive to the details of a cross-country move, but I am still anxious and excited. 

I like to think of it as youthful – a sort of childlike fascination with what’s around the corner – the same kind of sleepless excitement that you get on Christmas Eve when you know you will awaken to the thrill of gifts, laughter and joy. 

I laugh a little as I think of the memes about deciding not to adult – “I’ll be in my blanket fort with cookies and milk” or “I’ll be outside running through the sprinkler.” Waiting, planning, packing, counting the days – adulting is hard! The benefit is, when you’re an adult you know the reward at the other end with be worth it and the waiting and working for it make it all that much sweeter.

EPILOGUE: We have now completed the move and are living in our new home full time. The anticipation was, indeed, worth it. Everything I had hoped for is coming true and I find myself relaxing and enjoying a slower-paced lifestyle. Of course, I am also constantly looking forward to my next trip. After all … there’s a whole world out there just waiting to be explored!

Musings

Writing – It’s In My DNA

I’ve been reading a series of books by the same author for almost two years. I am so obsessed by the ongoing stories of the heroine that I have eschewed other authors as I dove into and through every one of the books published to-date in the series to catch up to the present. The next book isn’t due out for 6 weeks, so I returned the previous series I was reading to catch up on the five books that came out during my obsession.

A single chapter in and I am struck by the extreme differences in writing styles of these two best-selling authors. One is complex, even a bit cerebral, and challenges my academic sense while appealing to my dream of a world-class, jet-setting life. The other is more common and allows me to relate to the more realistic life of the heroine and her job while feeding those dreams of wealth and jet-set life the lead character finds herself in after a surprisingly fortuitous and deliciously passionate marriage. Despite the disparate styles of these authors, reading their novels compels me to write; to put pen to paper and give ink to the thoughts that occupy my waking moments. They inspire me .. and they help me realize that my style is yet a third style of writing for future readers to enjoy.

Inspiration — incentive — perhaps even a new-found enthusiasm for writing that seems to have evaded me for almost 10 years. Determination to re-find my muse and restart a process I had essentially abandoned.

Stay tuned — a novel is in the works.

Musings, Uncategorized

Free! There is a Reason to Join.

I’m a joiner. If a store where I shop has a free club, I join it. The same is true for restaurants, fast food places, airlines…the list goes on and on.

Why join, you ask? Here’s why: June is my birthday month. Beginning around the last week of May, my email box begins to include emails from all these companies with “Birthday Special” offerings. In many cases it’s an extra discount on any purchase in June. For a couple of airlines, it’s more than just a few percentage points off or bonus miles for flights booked in June. Hawaiian Airlines is offering me $50 off AND 2500 bonus miles! For several stores, it’s free shipping AND a discount during June. The best birthday specials, though, are the freebies. Yep – you read that right – FREEBIES.

birthday swag 2017

 

I have coupons in my email for a free slice of pizza from Sbarro, a free panty from Victoria’s Secret, free popcorn at Regal Cinemas and a free snack at AMC, a free bagel from Bruegger’s Bagels, a free BOGO offer for ice cream from Cold Stone Creamery, a free coffee and baked good from Au Bon Pain, a free cookie with a sandwich purchase at Potbelly, and a free glass of wine from my favorite winery – Narmada! That list doesn’t include the cash off a purchase offers from at least four stores!

Sure, I get a lot of “junk” email – ads from these companies – every day. Often the ads include some sort of click bait: “Free shipping today only!” “Special offer for valued customers” “20% off all online purchases TODAY ONLY.”  Every once in awhile I click on the ad just to see what’s on sale or to browse the new items. Those emails are deleted more often than they are opened.

So, the next time a cashier asks if you’re a club member, don’t say no! Say, “not yet” and sign up. Fill out the birthday block on the form then sit back and wait until your birthday rolls around and enjoy your gifts!

Happy birthday.

Disclaimer: Other than e-coupons, I have not received ANY compensation from any companies mentioned in this blog.

A roadrunner sits among various trees and plants in an Arizona neighborhood landscape.
Musings

Musings – The “Sounds” of Silence

Up at dawn, I lace-up my runners and grab my sunglasses as I head out the door. Even this early, the Arizona sun is blazing; the temperature already hovering around 80 degrees.

This early morning ritual, taking a long, contemplative walk before the world awakes, energizes me. It helps me clear my head so I can think big thoughts, plan my day, or contemplate the meaning of life. I leave the iPhone and the earbuds behind. This is not a time for music to intrude on my well-deserved solitude. I don’t need some app to tell me how far I walked, or the number of calories burned. This is a time for reflection; an opportunity to be outside and savor all the world has to offer.

Often, I encounter several others … neighbors out for their morning stroll, walking their dog, people running or biking, golfers heading to the club in their electric cards, construction workers and landscapers driving to the job in their pickups. Today that traffic, both literally and figuratively, is light.

A roadrunner sits among various trees and plants in an Arizona neighborhood landscape.
A roadrunner, one of the many types of birds in this part of Arizona, tries to hide among the neighbor’s plants. (J. Romano photo)

The man-made silence opens up the landscape to sounds … a variety of birds chirping and singing, bees buzzing, lizards skittering. It’s not unpleasant. In fact, it’s a happy chorus to my thoughts, reminding me that this is good; that nature is truly all around as and we are just a part.

There’s a whole world out there just waiting to be explored … even right outside your front door. Go see it!

 

 

Distractions, flying, Musings, Trains, travel

Travel … or Escape?

I am a writer and travel is my muse. Almost every time I board a plane or a train or even get into a car for a road trip my mind begins to work up some sort of story or thought. I have napkins full of scribbled thoughts. I have filled the margins of the magazines in the seat pocket. I even used an airplane “barf bag” once or twice to get my thoughts down on paper.

Flying soothes me. It’s uninterrupted time with my thoughts. No calls, texts, emails, Facebook, work, or any other distractions from time with myself. I read a bit, write a bit, and doze a bit. But, most of all, I enjoy the time to just think.

Sometimes my thoughts wander to my destination, perhaps something or someone I want to see when I get there. I’ve gazed out the window and written about something I could see — the sun rising above the clouds (or setting), the patchwork of fields below, the blur of trees as my train passes through a woodland.

Ahead of our trips, Greg and I always talk about what we plan to discuss in the air, instead we end up comfortably retreated into our own personal head spaces, while holding hands or leaning on each other. The fluffy bed of clouds outside the window evokes relaxation … literally thoughts of floating on a cloud. I love flying for that reason. Even when I’m headed somewhere I‘d rather not be, I find myself in a peaceful, contented cocoon of quiet. Airplanes don’t just take me to fun vacations; they take me above the heavy thoughts that surround me on the ground. Flying is an escape.

There’s a whole world out there just waiting to be explored … escape sometimes!